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Standing Naked: The Woman Behind The Light - Part 1
The story of the woman, the mission, and the dream.
I'm no ordinary woman.
I haven't had an ordinary life.
From a young age, I knew hate - I felt it to my very core.
By the time I was 12, I was convinced I was too fat to be in my own skin, that I needed to stay covered up.
All I ever wanted was for someone to love me, to truly love me.
I started having unexplainable medical issues at the age of 14.
By the time I was in my mid to late 20s, I was used to doctors calling me a medical mystery.
I was used to tests and biopsies, and mainstream doctors just giving up on me.
All I ever wanted was to be "normal," to be loved.
Of course, I dreamed about finding someone to love me endlessly, but that didn't fit in with my soul contract.
I know that now. At the age of 40 - never married, but having experienced many deep loves and many heartaches.
If I'd been coupled off, I couldn't possibly have met all of the beautiful souls I've come in contact with.
I probably wouldn't have traveled near and far, to Alaska, Hawaii, Italy, Switzerland, Australia, to name a few.
I wouldn't have ventured to so many music festivals or found so many of my soul connections.
I joke with people, saying, "You know how some people collect rocks? Well, I collect souls."
Even though I spent most of my 20s and a good portion of my 30s battling aches and pains, I was able to smile through it.
Maybe not when I was at home, alone, but when I was around others, I put on my smile and beamed my energy outward.
You know how most babies cry at birth?
Well, according to my mother, I was born smiling - just looking all around, happy to be here.
The doctor thought there was something wrong with me.
And maybe there is, but maybe, just maybe, God gave me this smile so I could endure all the pain that would come my way, so I'd ultimately be able to help others.
To help them survive their worst days, to inspire them to become the light as they walked through the darkness.
To help them on ordinary days, to remind them this life is a gift and that they are magic.
I read somewhere that you aren't just born a healer, that healers must experience and live through many different types of pain and healing so that they can heal others.
I earned my degree from the University of Florida in 2008 - a Bachelor of Science in Public Relations from the College of Journalism and Communications.
Since graduating, I have been working in the people industry.
If you think about what brings people together, you have food and beverage, music, and giving or a cause.
This is the realm I've always worked in - both paid and volunteer gigs.
This includes restaurants, hotels, breweries, bars, music venues, nonprofits, nonprofit events, and music, art, and dance festivals.
I have witnessed the power of music, the power of food, the power of dance, love, nature, and community - countless times.
All too often, I have also witnessed the destruction of a team of people or entire businesses, all because one person or a small group of people have forgotten how to treat people.
As a business owner or nonprofit organization, without people, you are nothing.
I spent much of my career coaching and teaching grown men 20–30 years my senior how to treat people - from staff to managers, guests, and their community.
I got into independent restaurant coaching following my Texas Roadhouse coaching days, with the intention of helping owners with public relations and marketing, but it became full-blown restaurant rescue.
In the hospitality industry, you will find people with the biggest, most loyal hearts.
Loyal to a fault; they believe in the mission, they believe in the promises... but the sad thing is, after a while, they don't stop believing in what the owners or managers say; they stop believing in themselves, and they stay stuck.
This led me to invent another type of coaching - SoulShine Coaching.
SoulShine Coaching is all about ripping off the layers of past pain, other people's opinions, and learned behaviors - until you are left with you, a bright, shining light.
I was helping people - friends and friends of friends - who were unhappy or depressed, determine why and encouraging them to make the necessary changes to create a happier, healthier life.
I wasn't telling people what to do.
I was asking them questions, pulling the answers out from their soul.
Helping them to correct their input - what they were feeding themselves - to get the desired outcome.
Over the years, I have used my natural talents - being able to transfer my energy and zap people with love and light, along with my education - learning how to survey the population for what was needed, determine what people respond to, analyze what's already been done, and create campaigns that appeal to a target market, to help restaurant and venue owners grow teams of empowered, loyal people, and to help charity events and nonprofit organizations succeed in their missions.
Now, I take that experience, and at 40 years young, I am ready to show the world what I have been creating in my heart.
I am ready to share the vision for the magical place I will create - my stamp on the world.
When I was 21 years old, I visited the Spirit of the Suwannee Music Park for the first time - for a music festival called Wanee.
Everywhere I walked, I heard people saying the same thing: "Why can't the real world be like this?"
They were referring to the love and kindness felt all around - that you could wear what you wanted, be who you wanted, and you were accepted.
The weirder, the better.
You could walk up to anyone's camp, and you'd be welcomed and offered food. You could play dress-up or carry around your favorite toy - yes, as adults - and not be judged.
My answer to this question - it can be.
It's up to you and me to create that world.
If you've experienced the love and magic of a music festival, I challenge you to bring that energy into the "real world."
I remember crying at the age of 27 when I was getting dressed for a JAX Chamber of Commerce Board Meeting - tears of joy - when I realized I had combined my "festival" clothes with my everyday work clothes.
I finally loved myself enough to dress for what made me happy. I was no longer dressing for how I was told I had to...
I still have the white lace flower skirt.
It's funny how so many of us care so deeply about what others think about us. What I teach now is to develop a strong opinion about yourself, so you don't accidentally go believing what others say about you.
Not everyone is going to like you, and that's okay - what is important is that you like you.
The world has hateful people in it, and everyone will be on the receiving end sometimes, but the way to fight back is to create more love.
We chase away the darkness by adding more light.
Hate doesn't beat hate.
Love does.
People will ridicule me, people will call me names, people will try to destroy my light - but I will press on.
I am divinely protected, and this is my divine mission, to bring people together.
I know my life's purpose is to build a healing retreat based on music, food, movement, nature, and love being medicine for the mind, heart, and soul.
I know it's my divine mission to create this space.
I've spent the last 15 years collecting the people needed to do so, because the magic is within us all, and when we combine our powers, we elevate.
The SoulShine Network is my forever project - it is a way for me to connect the brightest lights, to be the change in the world.
Einstein said the world will not be destroyed by those who do evil, but by those who stand by and watch.
I challenge you to stand with me, to choose to fight back against hatred by conjuring up an even greater dose of love to share with the world.
I couldn't possibly explain a lifetime of lessons in one essay or share my vision in its entirety - it is far too big.
But I am going to share it all with you.
Stay tuned.
I will share with you from the depths of my soul in my Standing Naked Series, host in-person events to bring you away from technology and back to reality, and invite you to help build the beauty that is beheld in my dreams.
Just wait.
Just when you think you have me figured out, that you've learned of all my layers, you'll be surprised again and realize you haven't.
I'm going to get deeply personal.
I'm going to say things that make you uncomfortable.
I will likely say things you don't agree with or don't believe.
I am going to share my madness with you - what makes me me.
For those of you who ask, "Are you always like this?" referring to my energy and positivity, this will answer the question.
My Standing Naked Blog/Podcast/Event Series will reveal the darkness I've walked through.
Light is one side of me, but can we have one without the other?
I will share my stories in the hopes that you, too, will be able to face your darkness and heal and grow from it.
We are not meant to hold onto the pain.
We are meant to feel it, experience it, and let it go... keeping what it taught us.
I believe we have the ability to heal ourselves.
I believe in being perfectly imperfect.
I believe we all rise together.
If my words resonate with you, I'd love to welcome you into the SoulShine Network.
Come find your people.
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